Permission To Dream

Two things:

1. I'm tired of being jealous of other people.

2. I've been thinking a lot about what Liz and I were talking about the other night.

I'll get the latter out of the way. We were talking about the future and how I've given up any plans and dreams I have because it'll just hurt worse...and she was telling me how God WANTS me to dream. I wasn't sure I believed that. I was thinking "If He has a plan for each of us, why would He want us to dream? What if it's not what He wants?"

Earlier, I was playing the lyric game, and I wanted to use lyrics that no one would know, and I thought of using an Enation song, and somehow the first one in my head was Permission to Dream, so I went in and listened to the song, and it was like...God speaking to me about what I'd been thinking about lately. Dreaming, and being too quiet when I'm supposed to be living OUT LOUD for Him...it's absolutely...wow. I have this feeling that me going through all this and then being drawn to this song was NOT an accident. I need to listen to it about fifty more times.

And now into the jealousy thing. I've been jealous of, somehow, mainly spiritual gifts. Like, other people being able to just think of a verse without remembering what it says, and it having helped someone else, and things like that. Isn't it odd how Satan gets so desperate that he puts jealousy over SPIRITUAL gifts in our heads? Silly Satan, God is my path.

Thank you to all who have been praying for me. I think it's working.